Mourning....

The sky is falling.

One of my favorite bands of all time has split up. Oh, excuse me -- the band has been put on hold. The Calling is going on a hiatus.

On the plus side, Alex Band is working on a solo album, which is fantastic. That child has one heck of a voice.

But I am so sad that I didn't get to see The Calling perform live. They were performing in Kansas on my birthday one year. My junior year of high school, I believe. I wanted to go see them so much.

Alas, I could not. And now, I'll probably never get to see The Calling perform live.

I'm somewhat terribly saddened by this realization.

Throat for Sale

Anyone want an inflamed larynx? It's all red and pretty like that. I wouldn't do much with it, as it is rather sore, but I'm sure it'd make a nice display somewhere.

Waiting for offers.

* * *

Hey, night-time drivers! You wanna know a secret?

If you turn your brights off, but not your headlights, you can still see the road. You can still see very well to drive in the dark night hours. With just your wee little headlights! Isn't that amazing?

So, please, do not utilize your brights just because the sun has gone out for the evening. Most of the time, you end up blinding other drivers because you forget to switch them off as a vehicle approaches you or you just don't care.

I don't need a migraine because of your lack of whatever. If you absolutely can't see without your brights after midnight, then I say, "You shouldn't be out on the road!"

* * *

Oh, Mr. Jason Mraz, why must you write such beautiful music? I lurve you so much. And then, I listen to your music, and I lurve you tons more.

You should come near me and play so's I can see you. That would be very nice of you.

I'll buy you a sno cone. *nods*

* * *

Why haven't they washed/cleaned Mt. Rushmore before now? I mean, 78 years is a looooooooooong time to wait before cleaning a national treasure. Do they wait 78 years to clean the Statue of Liberty?

I can't believe it's in fair condition, especially since it hasn't been cleaned in 78 years.

I don't know. Just a thought.

Did You Get My Message??

Do you ever wonder what happens to the words that we send? Do they bend? Do they break from the flight that they take, and come back together again with a whole new meaning in a brand new sense, completely unrelated to the one I sent?

* * *
Why can't I find a template I like? Can't they make new ones? Or someone make me one? I try to tweak the templates that are there.... but they end up all fugly.

Pretty please? *looks hopeful*

Notice!

The world revolves around me!

Well, not really. But I would appreciate it if I could buy the album/record/what-have-you that I'm looking for without travelling to three stores before finding it.

I finally found a copy of Jason Mraz's latest, Mr. A-Z, at the third store I visited. It's quite different from his debut album, I must say. It seems that I will always enjoy the Mraz-ness, no matter what he decides to do.

Confession time. I have a love for school supplies. I don't know why. I just love them. The smell of a fresh box of crayons should be a fragrance for both house and car. The sight of new lunchboxes, binders, notebooks, and pencil boxes all lined up in pretty, bright, shining rows.... oh! the joy of it all.

I wandered through the school supply aisles at several stores today. And then, when I had finished perusing them once, I turned around and wandered some more.

I mean, fine point pens, college-ruled paper.... what more could one want?

A few things, actually....

1. Tickets to a Jason Mraz concert
2. Sno-Cones as good as the ones I had at camp
3. Tickets to see The Killers
4. October
5. Michael Vartan to marry me
6. A trip to Neverland with Peter and Tink...

Random Rants of Mondays

Why can't McDonald's serve their entire menu all day? Why am I forced to eat something "breakfast"-y when I go there after work each morning? My day ends in the morning. In the morning, when my day ends, I would like to celebrate with a Quarter Pounder with Cheese, not a Chicken Bacon Egg McThingy.

* * *

A guy comes up to me at the Casino. "I've never seen you before," he says.

Well, you've got to be kidding me. There's only six billion people in the world, and you haven't once seen me??

Horrible.

* * *

It's impossible for me to smile.

Sorry if that sounds crazy, but it's true.

A lady at work comes in to get her tips. "Don't you ever smile? I come back here every day, and I have never seen a smile on your face."

Of course, I smile. The only difference is my smile is invisible. It's a secret smile.

Smiling is over-rated. Just so you know.

And if someone asks me again why I don't smile, I'm going to go crazy. Do I go around asking you why you smile all the time? Or why you look like a crazy person because you are smiling all the time?

* * *

Kids in Idaho are getting killed by playing "The Choking Game." Apparently, kids cut off the blood supply to their brains by choking one another.

They do this for fun.

I think there's something wrong with these kiddos. And if they're going to be that stupid and play a "game" like that, I think they should die.

Think about it. We've got enough stupid people in the world as it is. If these stupid people kill each other off, we won't have to worry about the next generation having as many stupid people.

It makes sense. Sounds morbid, but it does make sense.

* * *

Holy Mackeral.

A five dollar bill came into my possession at the Casino last night. One of its previous owners had drawn all over Abraham Lincoln's face. They also left the comment, You're a n------ lover and that's why you died.

First of all, Abraham Lincoln has been deceased for many years. So, I think the proper grammar would have been you were, not you're.

Second, who says stuff like that? I don't care if you are holding a grudge against a man who died some 140 years earlier. If you don't have something intelligent to share with the world, Bubba, I'd appreciate it if you kept your redneck mouth shut.

Abraham Lincoln was a great man. He had his flaws, but I don't believe the one left on the five dollar bill was one of them.

* * *

I have the Black Lung.

Inhaling copier toner dust for two weeks will do that to you. Blackness fills my lungs.

I feel like Derek Zoolander did when he worked one day in the mines with his father and brother.

Anyway.

Not a Fan

I'm not a fan of Life right now. The last three weeks have been one giant suckfest after another, and quite frankly, I'm tired of it.

I want to go away and hide somewhere where I can't be found. I think I'm going to do that.

Don't come looking for me. I'll come back when I'm good and ready.

Are You Asleep?

Did you know that if your house doesn't have a garage, it's not really a respectable home?

Or so I hear.

* * *

The girl I'm rooming with comes in just seconds before "room-check" last night. I'm nearly half zombie because I haven't been sleeping well and I'm waiting for her to get her butt in the room. She's the only camper that I have to watch and "room-check".

The lights are out in the room. As she walks in, I say, "Make sure you're at least on the dorm floor by 10:45."

She says, "Okay." Then, she pauses. "Are you asleep?"

Not just yet. I mean, I just sat up in bed when you came in the door and reminded you that you're supposed to be on this floor by 10:45 p.m. So, unless I'm narcoleptic and not aware of my narcolepsy, I don't believe I'm asleep just yet.

Kids.

* * *

So, I've gotten teased all day for being "twitterpated." In fact, the teaser tells me that I'm "more than a little twitterpated." He think it's great fun to tease me mercilessly.

And then, he'll stop. He waits quietly, letting my mind forget that he's been teasing me. After a few minutes, he starts back up again.

Oh, geez.

The Not So Glamourous Life of a Junior Staffer

I'm at speech camp. It's hot. And I get the honor of rooming with a camper for the next week. What fun.

The drive down here was uneventful. Although, we did take a nice detour. The detour did not go where I wanted it to go, and thus, I am unhappy about the results of the detour.

So far this evening, we've watched a lady dancing or praising someone on the side of the street. We've also seen another woman who was walking right in the middle of a busy street. She was just trotting down the turn lane as if she owned the place.

It was quite bizarre.

Tomorrow starts early for me. I have to help out at registration. I don't get to help out a lot with the individual classes at speech camp. I'm mostly behind-the-scenes, helping to keep the camp running as smoothly as possible.

I'm a glorified personal assistant to several different people at once.

But being a former camper, the camp is enjoyable. You can learn how to perfect your performances in humerous duets, dramatic duets, extemporaneous speaking, and the like. The second week focuses more on Lincoln-Douglas Debate and Cross-Examination Debate. It's a little less fun.

However, while it is a lot of work, there are fun things to do most every night.

I am hoping for a visitor to come by this week.... it would make my week so fantastic....

*whistles*

Dear Small Town America....

You're driving me crazy.

Today, I go to the high school to see if I can pick up my transcript. Again, no one is there. And why is no one there? Because they've decided to remodel some things. Great. That's fabulous. I wish you would have told me this before you told me I could drop by any time to pick up my transcript.

The transcript was not available. Again.

Then, as I was driving back from the school, I notice that this family-run used car lot has a new roof. And on the roof, painted in big red letters, are the words : Jesus Is Coming Soon.

Now, while I don't doubt that Jesus will one day be returning to Earth, it's a little odd for this family to be proclaiming it from their rooftop. I don't know how things are in their heart of hearts, but from the image they project, I find it hard to take them seriously with their proclaimation.

I don't know how they live their lives behind closed doors. But I still find it odd. Whatever, though. Free country. You can do and say as you please. As long as you're within the limits of the law.

Some road construction was happening on the other main thoroughfare through town last week. This week, they've decided to put up signs announcing that the roads were being worked on.

However, it seems to me that they already did all the work they're going to do. And they did it all last week, when they didn't have these orange signs warning everyone of their intentions. It really doesn't make sense for them to be putting up these signs now.

There's a sign that reads: Loose Gravel, 35 M.P.H. Okay. Fine. Whatever. Except for the fact that there's no loose gravel on the highway. There's some huge piles of loose gravel off to one side of the highway, but not any actual loose gravel on the highway. And the piles of loose gravel are a decent distance from the road. So, unless they want families to slow down through that area and marvel at the scenery of loose, piled gravel, I don't know why the crud those signs are in place.

Oh. And another thing, Small Town America, utilize the blinkers on your vehicles! They are in place for you to communicate with other drivers that are sharing the road with you. That's right, sharing the road. Just because you're on the road, it does not mean that the road is yours to hog. Back off, Bubba.

And use your blinkers. If you decide to go over the top of a hill and turn off suddenly, how am I supposed to know what you're wanting to do? Am I supposed to use some clairvoyant powers to "see" what you wish to do?

Do you "see" that I want to shove my fist into your face for aggravating me after a ten-hour shift?

No. I didn't think so. So, please, use your blinkers and your brakes. Otherwise, my truck is going to run over your vehicle. It's as simple as that.

Oh, Geez.

Work was oddly therapeutic this evening. I mean, I had a lot to do. And basically, I was the only one working. My boss was in there with me this evening. She doesn't do a whole lot. She mostly just watched me.

And what a night to watch me! Everything I was responsible for came out balanced! Exactly to the penny! Go me!

All that work helped me think through some things I have been mulling over lately. I've come to a clear decision.

I can't wait to go back to school in August. I wish it was August 3. 'Cause then, I'd have like 10 days before I got to go back.

I'll have my private room, my French classes, my little convenience store job.

Of course, there will be things that I miss terribly. Things and people that I'll be sad to be so far from.

But I have to go. I can't stay in this town. More power to the people who can, but I am not one of them.

Sorry, town. I hate to break it to you, but I don't like you very much. And I don't care what you think.

Oh, geez.

The Early Morning Wakey Wakeys

Okay. This is the second day in a row that I've woken up at 5 a.m. There's no need for this.

Yesterday, I fell back asleep after being awake two hours. Maybe I'll do that today.

But until then, I'm going to provide random thoughts and rants.

So...

The new LOGO channel is airing. Some Christian advocacy group claims that the 24 hour television network for gay and lesbian individuals is an "assault on the nation's children."

I think... everyone just needs to leave everyone else alone. The Bible teaches to "Judge not, lest ye be judged." So, why does it appear that most Christian groups are doing the judging in this world??

I believe in God. But I also believe that I do not have the right to tell someone how to live their life. I don't believe in condemning other religions because they don't have the same beliefs that I do. And I don't believe that the LOGO channel is an "assault on the nation's children."

I mean, if you are to believe that about LOGO, what about the other channels that are geared specifically towards one group of people? How about Lifetime? Can Lifetime be considered an "assault on the nation's" men? It is the "Television for Women." And they generally make men out to be evil, lying backstabbers.

Hm. I think I'll boycott Lifetime. I was never one to watch Lifetime in the first place, but now, I won't watch it at all. I can't support a television channel that's assaulting a group of people.

* * *

I love Jason Mraz. The man just writes such beautiful songs. And when he sings, he just pours his heart and soul into every word. It's just awesome. Plus, he enjoys Elton John. Anyone who enjoys Elton John is okay with me.

I want to go to a Jason Mraz show. Will someone take me? I promise I'll be good.