Things I Dislike

1. My laptop, Kip. He is sharp shooting pain in my aorta. And sharp shooting pains in your aorta are not good. I'm currently typing this with a very dim screen. So dim that it hurts my eyes AND my aorta.

2. Kids that throw trash in the bed of my truck. I don't throw trash in your vehicle, now, do I? And if I find out who keeps using my truck as a trash receptacle, I'm going to set a trap to catch the perp.

3. Food that contaminates living beings. What the crap is up with the food contamination? First, my favorite peanut butter is targeted. And now my dog?! What did my dog ever do to deserve poisoning? A big fat nothing. Food is not supposed to kill you. Predators can kill their prey, though. Are we being killed off by some big bad predator? Hmmm... makes one think....

4. Gas prices. Next week, I'll have to sell my liver on the black market to fill up my gas tank.

5. School papers. I am so freakin' tired of writing papers. And since my laptop is being dumb, I have to write with a very dim screen, borrow a suitemate's laptop (which I hate doing), or spend hours on end in the library. Do you know what lurks in the library? Germs! Monster germs of death that try to kill me with the flu and all kinds of nasty diseases.

6. All University of Florida sports teams. If they win another thing, I will puke on my new shoes. They're a freakin' monopoly! Give someone else a chance, for crying out loud! You don't have to win everything to be considered great. It just overinflates your ego to the point of obnoxiousness.

7. Daylight Savings Time. It's dumb. I wish the days were all the same length all year long. I also find it rude to give someone an extra hour of sleep in the fall only to take away that hour in the spring. That's just bad manners.

8. Parents that don't take care of their children. You bring them into the world and you should take care of them. If you don't want to take care of them, then sign over your rights. You're just dead weight, pulling down your kid. And how rude is it to bring a child into the world anda not take care of the child? Like the kid can go out on Day 3 of Life and interview for a job.

9. Dumb people. People who behave without thinking or who behave selfishly irritate me. Think of your fellow man for once! You've got to share the world with other people, you know. Contrary to whatever your mommy told you, you are not the center of the universe.

10. Right now, I don't have a number 10. However, if you know me, you also know that given a short amount of time, I will find something else to dislike.