How Everywhere Is Everywhere??

Starting everywhere this Friday.

In theaters everywhere.

I hear variations of those two sentences all the time, usually after a movie trailer airs on television. But just how everywhere is everywhere?

The Movie-Voice-Over-Person says that this film will be showing everywhere or is already showing everywhere. But is it really showing everywhere? Half the time they say that, I never see the movie being shown anywhere near me.

Webster defines everywhere as being "in every place or part."

So, how can they say that a movie is being shown everywhere, when it's clearly not being shown everywhere. That sounds like false advertisement to me. Shouldn't they be forced to say, In theaters in a Major Metropolitan Area Near You?

Sure, it doesn't roll off the tongue as easily as In theaters everywhere. But it's correct! And isn't that what it's all about, people? There's always some group protesting that they want things to be correct in society.

Something needs to be done. When I see a movie trailer proclaiming In theaters everywhere, I expect to be able to see that movie anywhere I may be.

That's the whole point of everywhere.