A Veritable Potpourri of Crap

What is the meaning of the Toyota commercial where this man and woman are driving down the road and the woman refuses to pull over to get gas even though the gas gauge is on E? I mean, I understand that they're trying to demonstrate that the car gets exceptional gas mileage, but it's really kind of dumb. Why the hell doesn't the woman just pull over and fill up the car? The gas gauge is on E. Cars often stop moving once the gas gauge lands on E. Therefore, one might think she'd go ahead and get gas because she's eventually going to need it. Just pull the damn car over and get some gas, lady!

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I was stalked briefly yesterday by some kid at the bookstore. The kid ended up being my cashier-person and also ended up following me out of the store and down the road a bit. It wasn't very thrilling, like the movie stars make it seem. I spent the majority of my brief stalking encounter trying to think of what I could use in my truck as a weapon. I shan't repeat what I decided to use here; you may be the stalker next time and I'll need to use my weapons.

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I have a new job! And I lurve it!

I also want to go to law school. I am studying for the LSAT. This I do not lurve.

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Where does one find a sledgehammer? At a home improvement store? Because my truck really needs one. Or, rather, I need one. My truck is in dire need of a... motivational speech of sorts. One that includes a demonstration involving a sledgehammer.

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I'm just going to come right out and say this: I was disappointed with the concluding book to the Harry Potter series. Not your best work, J.K. It was unsatisfying and lackluster. Where was the pizzaz? The crazy out-of-left-field surprises that you're famous for? I wish you'd waited a few more years or something. I'm certain you could have done better.

That is my opinion and I shall state it wherever and whenever I please, despite the fact that I may be boo-ed at from all over the world for saying so.

One Day Slasher

My cousin and I were driving down the highway when we passed a car dealership. Outside the dealership, the highway was lined with little signs proclaiming 'One Day Slasher!"

I assume that they were having some sort of sale. But, for a split second, I thought that perhaps there was a murderer loose.

Couldn't they have said "One Day Sale" instead of "One Day Slasher" ?? It sounds nicer and doesn't bring to mind crazy slasher-murderers running about slashing thing.

Just a thought.

Ramblings in the Night

I need a job. Or a life plan. The end.

My truck likes to pull crap and anger me.

I can't decided on a career. I don't want work to be work. I want to enjoy what I do. Is that too much to ask?

I'm being disillusioned by capitalism.

I like living in large metro areas where I have access to things that interest me. Now, if only I had the money to find the things that interest me...

I wish people would not look at me awkwardly on the roadways. Especially when I do not give them reason for said awkward looks. It makes me angry.

I wish I could be content with the status quo instead of always feeling indifferent or discontent.

I wish I was as smart as people think I am.

I wish my alma mater would quit calling to see if I have a job yet.
A) I just graduated two months ago.
B) It's hard to get a job without experience.
C) You people are rubbing salt in an open wound.

Goodbye, My Darling

Rest in peace.

"To Go"

Yesterday, I saw a store called "Condoms To Go."

But, really, aren't they all "to go"?